Fun Fabulous Foto Friday

Well, I've been depressed lately. So, it's time to pick up my ass and carry on. Here are some photos I just felt the need to share since I've missed a couple of Wordless Wednesday. Let's keep it fun for the day..........Enjoy these photos!

BY THE WAY, TODAY IS SHERYL AT PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY'S BOATS BIRTHDAY!! She doesn't have a blog up yet this morning, but still jump over there and wish her a HAPPY BIRTHDAY. A-hem. I won't give her age out but let's just say ........she's about 4 months older than me! I love you and Happy Birthday Sheryl!

More Than A Single Mom Goes To Nine Inch Nail Concert

Why More Than A Single Mom Should Stay Home

More Than A Single Mom Goes To Great America!

It Just Doesn't Seem To End

I owe y'all an explanation huh? The blogger neglect, the sad poem from my aching heart, all of it from deep within.

I've got issues. No really, I do. Turns out More Than A Single Mom isn't perfect. Ha ha. Just had to throw that in there.

It all started with a big fight with the Tiger (hence the poem). A really nasty, apologies can't take back what I said earlier fight. A fight like no other. A fight about Missy on top of it all. He broke my heart just days before Xmas and I didn't really think I would bounce back from this one. But, I did. I always do right? But, hmmmmmmm those words are still in the back of my head. I just can't seem to let shit go some days. I love the Tiger with all my heart. But, I won't lie. I love my daughter more. Is that bad? Her and I have a bond that will never change. I am protective of her. She's my baby. And we've been through hell and back before the Tiger came along......that he will never ever understand. Yes, we're still together. But, I feel different about it all. I can't help it. I just do.

My heart aches for my family. It's the season to be happy right? My aunt was hospitalized on Sunday, fighting for her life. She's still there. My mom and I went up there on Christmas Day. There's something ironic about that. Me and my mom, together, on Christmas Day......hanging out? Twas strange. Back to the story. I won't say much about my Aunt without Teaching Kindergarten's permission. It's her mama and her story to share. But, please bloggers, pray like you have NEVER PRAYED BEFORE. If anything happens to my aunt (who is secretly one of my favorite aunts) then I honestly don't know how I'll cope. She is one of the most wonderful people I have ever had the chance of knowing...........and she's supposed to live forever.

Yesterday I got to go to the movies with some very dear friends of mine and our kids. How is it that between the three of us, we managed to produce the most perfect, beautiful 5 1/2 children?? Seriously, our kids were so good in that theatre you would've thought we gave them tranquilizers. I was so very impressed since they all ranged from 4 to 7.......or is Luke still 3? Hmmm, I think he's 4. I love you both and I am soooooooo happy you guys agreed to take the kiddies out with me.

After the movies, things went back to normal. I got a frightful call from my mom that my stepdad had been in a car accident. Someone was trying to beat a car coming while trying to pull out of a gas station and in turn, rammed through the back of my stepdad's van. Thankfully, he is ok. Vans can be replaced. He could not. So, in that small silver lining, I am just happy because he was hit pretty hard and it could've been a lot worse.

I love you all. That's my story. December sucked ass for me. I just want the New Year to be here so I can stop wallowing in all this funk and move on.

P.S. My daughter can't stand me right now because I am gone 7 days a week working 2 jobs. Talk about a mouth on a cute kid. Anyone like to have her until Christmas Break is over???? She knows how to empty garbage and pick up toys and make up songs in the shower -- daily.

Thankful

Before I wish everyone the usual Merry Christmas, I just have to say thank you. I have to thank all my blogging friends for their love and support. Some of you made me cry after reading those comments on my last blog.

Everything seems ok I guess. I will save the details for another blog.....but, for now I am on the way to the hospital to visit someone.

Pictures to come. Christmas stories to tell. For now, I just wanted to say thank you and I love you all.......and MERRY CHRISTMAS

Numb

Words can't express what I feel today.

How can a person you love hurt you so much?

I thought love was unconditional.

It is not.

To say the things you said and then expect me to smile?

There is no smile on my face.

I am only human.

And I am hurt.

I don't need anyone.

I don't need you.

I am alone in this world.

Seems I always have been.

Today is a bad day.

Throwback Thursdays - A First Birthday Party

I remember that first birthday party like it was yesterday............amazing how fast time flies.

It's A Bird! It's A Plane! Nahhhhh, It's A Hoopla!

Mimi from Mimi's Toes tagged me for a "hoopla", not a meme. By the way, you SHOULD run over and say hi to Mimi. She's got beautiful toes :)

Here are the instructions:1. List 12 random things about yourself that has to do with Christmas.
2. Please refer to it as a hoopla and not the dreaded "m" word.
3. You have to specifically tag someone when your're done, no leaving
it open.
4. Do it quickly, Lets get as many people tagged as possible.

Here Goes Nothing! You ready?????

1. When I was a little girl, my mom had this boyfriend who was mean and one year he ruined our Christmas tree because he was drunk. That year was the last Christmas I spent with my mom before my Grandparents took me.......but I'm an adult and spend Christmas with her now. But, it's a childhood memory I'll always remember at this time of year.
2. I can't ever remember the 12 Days of Christmas song in the right order. I try, but I can never do it. Can you???
3. My favorite Christmas movie is "Grandma Got Ran Over By A Reindeer." I've seen it three times on Disney already this year (once after Missy was in bed).
4. I could eat my weight in Christmas Cookies. Seriously. The more frosting, the more gingerbread, the better.
5. I do not like to eat Candy Canes. They get stuck in my teeth. I do not like hard candy stuck to the enamel of my teeth. I have enough teeth issues.
6. I have never seen a real mistletoe. Nor have I ever even been kissed under a fake one.
7. I love ornaments that have names and years on them. I want to look back at them 20 years from now and remeber exactly what made me buy that particular piece....and to know how old it is. I want my grandchildren to use those ornaments.
8. Santa only leaves one present at our house. He's so busy and has so many toys to deliver that he can only deliver one per child in our world. It works for me and we've always done it this way.
9. I don't own a nativity scene. I wish I did. Maybe someday.
10. I want one of those gawdy lawn decorations at Christmas, but our house is so old it has never had outside outlets to plug into. And I don't want the cord coming out of the garage all winter.
11. I love love love to wrap presents. I have a technique. I get out 3 rolls of paper, sometimes 4......use a different wrap for each gift. So that way if I have a few gifts for someone they usually end up with their gifts wrapped differently. I'm weird. I know this. You don't have to remind me. I like to think outside of the box.
12. There is nothing better than sitting wtih a cup of hot chocolate on a wintery Sunday afternoon watching the Christmas movies on the Hallmark Channel or on Lifetime. ........

Now, who is going to do a Hoopla? Let's see.........Today we will tag the Bane Sisters. Milk and Honey.........AND PBJ Boats. You have been HOOPLA-ED!

One Minute Inside A Woman's Head

Got my first paper cut at the new job. Right on the knuckle of the pinky finger. Can we say OUCH? And rub your hands with a little lotion and the stinging intensifies. New job could be dangerous.

This lady I work with at the new job is a trip. I wanna move her in and have her live with me so I can see her all the time. She's one of the older ladies that is just quirky. I am not even sure quirky is right. We'll call her down right strange. I blogged before about how her dogs were her kids.......and I didn't realize that. Apparently she had an odd obsession for birds. She can name every type of dog and bird that is out there. Trust me. She did. And for a moment I thought I was watching Ripley's Believe It Or Not instead of scanning papers.

Oh yeah, and at my new job we are treated like children. We get gold stars for doing good things (nominated by other co-workers) and we get black stars (given by our boss) for doing bad things. So far I have no stars. And I am floored that I am on a "star" process. I feel five.

My house is dirty. I am working 7 days a week. And last night I looked at it. I was ashamed. The dishes are piling up. There are unwrapped presents everywhere. The garbage cans are full. There are 6 loads of laundry just screaming at me. And let's not even talk about the need to clean out the refrigerator. If someone popped in un-announced right now, I would cry. Seriously. The Tiger is trying to help but he's in finals week right now so if he's not at work, his head has been in a book. And the kid? Well, oddly enough her room is the ONLY clean room of the house. I am thinking it's time to teach her to do my laundry. Mmmmmmmm, she can sort colors and measure. She can work a remote, why not a washer? I don't think she'll eat the detergant???

Happy Birthday Tiger........

Words cannot express how much I love you........for accepting my child as if she were your own, for allowing us to completely take over your house (and add girly stuff), for telling me how everything is going to be ok (because I constantly worry), and for never judging me on the mistakes I make. Happy Birthday my Tiger!

I'm A Big Girl Now

I completed my first day at a new job. A NEW job. That is so crazy to me. I walked in and was forced to be introduced to every single member of the department. Can I remember their names? No way. They all blur together as of now. I've worked in HR for years now and we always do this with our new employees too. I know how those people feel. Stupid. That's right. I wanted the floor to open up and swallow me. Note to bosses.......it's too intimidating to do that to someone on their first day.

The new job. It's easy. Wow, was it easy. And boring. Did I mention that part? I'd like to know how some of them have been doing this for 20 years. Seriously, you have been filing papers for 20 years? Bet you know your alphabet by now! Sorry, no offense, but I am only here until I get my degree......I cannot hang out in that small back office space for 20 years listening to some woman go on and on about her dogs ----- who I mistook for being grandkids since they are named Jake and Sarah.

So day #1. This very nice lady who is training me told me about 239 times that I MUST REMOVE THE STAPLES before scanning. She said and I quote, "The scanner does not like it. You must remember this. We don't like ripped up paper." Ok. I got it the first time. But, she felt the need to remind me with every file I grabbed.

The best part of my day........goes to this woman in the back office that did NOT remember the staple rule. During my 6 hours there, she jammed the scanner 3 times with staples. Yes, 3 times! After the last time, I couldn't help myself. I asked, "How long have you worked here?" She said, "5 years.".............WOW, the staple rule must be harder than I thought.

The second best part of the day........The free luncheon. I started on the day of the hospital's holiday lunch. Woo Hoo! The food wasn't too bad either. I noticed everyone sits in groups. Like a clique. I was sad. As I looked at the nurses at the pediatric table with their cute little Snoopy scrubs and the nurses in the Surgical department with their cute little head cover hat thingys......I knew I was at the wrong table. I wanted to be one of them so bad! In due time, I know. For now, I sit with the ladies from the back office..............

Wordless Wednesday - The Start Of A New Job

A Blogger's Disappearance

Well the Bad Dentist came back and put this blogger under the weather for the last few days. Good news is 3 of my teeth have been fixed. Better news is that I couldn't eat for a couple of days and my jeans are fitting good today! Bad news is that I have to go back and see the mean man at the end of this month for more work.

I got the job at the hospital! I start training next week ----- on my day off my from my Chicago job. Basically, starting on Monday, I will be working 7 days straight until my final day in Chicago (January 8th). It's going to be so exhausting, but the money will be good to throw into savings.

Wednesday, while I was screaming in pain from the dentist, I went and had my drug test done as well as my first hepatitis shot series, and my Rubella shot, and I have no idea what else I was shot up for. All I remember is they took blood - lots of blood.

As I left, I took a moment to look around at my surroundings. I've passed St. Anthony 1,000 or more times since I've lived in NW Indiana. Never in my life would I think I was going to be an employee there - ever. But, as I clutched my new employee parking pass, I trudged through the snow to my car. My last visit in the visitor section. It was surreal. A new beginning is upon me.

I'm getting scared. I am calm about school. I really am. I'm on the Dean's list so I am guessing I should be able to handle the classes fine. Financially, I am stressing to no end. Tiger and I are very used to my income downtown. As I cried the other day thinking, "How will I pay for groceries?" He keeps telling me that we'll be fine. The mother, the stresser, the pessimest in me just isn't so sure. Have I made the right decision? Isn't the point of getting an education supposed to be fruitful in the end and someday my worries will subside? Ugh. I just wish I could shake the helpless and unsure feeling.

Oh Monday! Go Away!

Well, so far today I've managed to forget my cell phone at home. This is usually attached at my hip. I feel as if I am not wearing a bra. Ha! And if that isn't bad enough, I have managed to lose my key card which has my office key on it. So, I had to stand outside my office pretending to not look stupid for over 20 minutes waiting for someone to come and unlock my door. Go away Monday.

On a plus side, I found out from all my "reference people" that the hospital called Thursday and Friday to check my references. That's a GOOD sign. Now, if they would only call me and give me the job. Oh wait, they could be calling my cell phone right now that is laying on my bed at home.

All my Christmas decorations are up.......now it's time to wrap presents. Let Christmas be upon us. I am ready!